Divorce and Identity Coaching FAQs: What You’ve Been Asking Me (and What I Really Think)

by Allen  - November 1, 2025

When people reach out for coaching, they usually start here:

They’re curious, but hesitant.

It makes sense. Identity coaching isn’t something most of us grew up hearing about. It sits somewhere between therapy, mentorship, and the kind of guiding I do in the outdoors- the guy who makes sure you’ve packed what you actually need for what’s ahead.

So today, I’m answering some of the most common questions I get- honestly, and without the jargon.


1. “What exactly is divorce coaching? How is it different from therapy?”

A therapist looks into your backpack and asks, “Why did you pack what you packed?”

Coaching is a bit different. We’ll talk about what’s in your backpack, sure- but mostly to make sure you’re ready for where you’re headed.


2. “Am I too early (or too far along) for coaching?”

If you’re asking that question, you’re probably right on time.

Coaching works best when the dust is settling- when you’re ready to stop just surviving and start moving forward.


3. “Do I have to talk about my ex the whole time?”

Nope. This isn’t marriage counseling.

It’s about you– your time, your energy, your direction.


4. “What if I don’t know what I want yet?”

Perfect. That’s actually where we begin.

You don’t have to know the destination before you start walking again. The first step is often just learning how to want something for yourself again.


5. “Is this just for men?”

Not even close.

I work with men and women, and you don’t even have to be divorced. Anyone who is rebuilding after a major life transition- or is struggling with identity and purpose- is a great candidate for coaching.

The only requirement: honesty and a willingness to show up.


6. “What’s the structure of your program?”

Ten sessions over twelve weeks.

Each one is focused, reflective, and personal. You’ll also get access to digital tools, journal prompts, and optional assignments to keep you moving between sessions.


7. “Do I have to commit before I talk to you?”

Nope.

We start with a conversation, and trust me- I won’t sell you on coaching if we’re not a fit. You’ll get a sense of how I work, and I’ll see if I can genuinely help. If it feels right, we move forward.


If you’ve been on the fence about coaching…

Maybe this helps clear some of the fog.

And if there’s a question I didn’t answer here, drop a comment or send a message- I’d love to hear from you.


Some Words I Like:
“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.”
C.S. Lewis


Where to Start

Free Resource #1: The Divorce Debrief Mini-Course
A 4-part video series to help you make sense of what just happened and start building real momentum again.
👉 Get the Free Mini-Course

Free Resource #2: The Reclaiming Self-Worth Journal
28 days of reflection and reconnection to remind you who you are (and who you’re becoming).
👉 Download the Journal

Want something more personal?
Schedule a free clarity call.
👉 Book Here


If you found this helpful:
Share it with someone who might need it.
You’d be surprised how many people are quietly trying to rebuild without a map.

Free Download

How To talk To your kids about divorce (Without Making it weird)

Free

The Space Between Stimulus and Response
Navigating the Holidays as a Divorced Parent: Building Joy Through Change

Allen

I am a father, husband, coach, outdoor guide, educator, and middling endurance athlete who believes that small changes make a BIG difference.

I believe that when we identify the patterns in our lives, we are able to make changes to create the best versions of ourselves.

I know that divorce is devastating. I also know that we can come through on the other side not just as survivors, but as examples who can provide hope and inspiration for others.

I'd be honored to hear your story, and to help you write the next chapters.

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}

You may be interested in

>